The letter h I can't pronounce.
But a dutiful Priapus I
always take my vengeance
on the thief's heinous
crime regardless of impediment.
Notes on Priapea IX:
The meter of the poem is elegiac.
This translation is a free recreation of the original.
The key to the original involves the pronunciation of
the Roman letters "t" and "p," which were pronounced
"te" and "pe." The text instructs the reader to pick out
"t p dico," the phrase which reveals Priapus' method of
punishment. This is spoken as "te pedico" -- I bugger you.