Dr. Alaaktraz,

Bobby Fluegel's recovery is remarkable. Much as we would like to, at your suggestion, attribute his recovery to the new experimental medicine, we have not yet begun to administer it to him.

Just this afternoon Dr. Winston and I conducted the sonnet cycle again, and the results are noticeably different from the results of the same examination just a week ago.

The difference should be apparent to you from the following two transcripts. First, here is the examination as conducted last week by Dr. Winston accompanied by a graduate research assistant:

Dr. Winston: Bobby, are you ready.

Bobby Fluegel: Sure

DW: Okay Bobby. Same as last time. I'm going to read you a line and you just tell me what I said, or what you think about. Okay?

BF: Yes. Yahoo!

DW: Those hours, that with gentle work did frame.

BF: Times like these were made for Taster's Choice. Miller time. Dr. Pepper, ten, two and seven. Seven-Eleven.

DW: All right. Now let's try another: The lovely gaze where every eye doth dwell,

BF: Lenscrafters.

DW: Will play the tyrants to the very same

BF: Civilization.

DW: What?

BF: Civilization, Call to Power.

DW: Ahm ... And that unfair which fairly doth excel:

B: Microsoft. Excel. ... Word for Windows.

DW: (quietly) Word for windows indeed. But soft, what light through yonder window ...

B: Whatchamacalit?

DW: Sorry, Bobby, I was just mumbling to myself ... ahm, For never-resting time leads summer on

B: Keeps on ticking.

DW: To hideous winter and confounds him there;

B: York Peppermint Patties.

DW: Sap cheque'd with frost and lusty leaves quite gone,

B: Chex? Frosted flakes? Lucky charms?

DW: Beauty o'ersnow'd and bareness every where:

B: Snow white. Disney's Snow white. Smokey the Bear.

DW: Then, were not summer's distillation left,

B: Weight Watchers.

DW: A liquid prisoner pent in walls of glass,

B: Is that Grey Poupon?

DW: Beauty's effect with beauty were bereft,

B: Cosmopolitan. Marie Claire.

DW: Nor it nor no remembrance what it was:

B: I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.

DW: But flowers distill'd though they with winter meet,

B: Otter Pops?

DW: Leese but their show; their substance still lives sweet.

B: Sweet ... Tarts.

Here is a transcript of relevant portions of the examination conducted earlier today:

DW: Those hours, that with gentle work did frame

B: Hours with work, um... That means that someone put work around uh, hours?

DW: The lovely gaze where every eye doth dwell,

B: Lovely gays... Um... Those are, like, guys who... like guys. I don't know "doth."

DW: Will play the tyrants to the very same

B: That's like ... um ... a football game maybe, but I don't know that there's a team called the Tyrants.

DW: And that unfair which fairly doth excel:

B: Unfair is ... like when you buy software and it doesn't, um, work right. I don't know what made me think of that. You said "Excel"?

DW: For never-resting time leads summer on

B: Yeah. Times goes on. On to fall.

DW: To hideous winter and confounds him there;

B: See? Confounds is to, uh, make summer mad because it's like winter, and someone took summer there and it's too cold ...

DW: Sap cheque'd with frost and lusty leaves quite gone,

B: That's a forest when it's cold out, and some silly sap is stuck out there.

DW: Beauty o'ersnow'd and bareness every where:

B: Snow covered up the beauty.

DW: Then, were not summer's distillation left,

B: Then summer has a ... a ... distillation? I don't understand.

DW: A liquid prisoner pent in walls of glass,

B: Um, I think that's a fishtank maybe, like the screensaver shows you.

DW: Beauty's effect with beauty were bereft,

B: I don't know what a bereft is.

DW: Nor it nor no remembrance what it was:

B: So, I guess summer changed?

DW: But flowers distill'd though they with winter meet,

B: Um, because flowers can't grow in winter.

DW: Leese but their show; their substance still lives sweet.

B: Chocolate. That was fun. Did I win anything?

I recommend that the experimental treatment not be begun.